Plus point, seals were too adorable throughout the movie. Pretty creatures.
Friday, March 20, 2015
Lighthouse Dreams
Been long since I sat down and watched a movie from start to end. Finally managed to do so yesterday with my littlest brother, and had a whale of a time. We watched an animation film called Song of the Sea, and absolutely loved it. All I have been watching recently is bitchy dramas full of over-emphasized situations and emotions, land this felt like a good break away from all of that. Originally a tale that came from a folk legend, illustrated through colourful drawings and enthralling songs, and a touching ending. Simple children's film, but it tugged at the heartstrings. Still feeling snuggly after watching the movie.
Monday, March 9, 2015
Spark
In a day that was horrid and left me tired, hungry and hopeless, I remember this conversation that occurred between me and the kids today.
"So all of you please remember to go find your sources over the March holidays okay? You all can find from online...blah blah... or you can go museum and look around, free one"
"Cher, we go as a class can, all of us go together, save time."
"You all can choose to go as a class, individually, anything. Just remember to find the sources by first week of Term 2."
"But Cher, if we all go together, you must go along and accompany us leh!"
"Why should I, you all so big already, don't tell me you don't know the way there pls. See how, if got time then I go with you all."
This boy, who always talks nonsense in my class "But Cher, it's only considered a class outing if you are with us. You not there, something is missing from our class. You there, then our class is complete ma."
And they continue justifying why I should go along with all of them.
Probably the best thing that I remember from today. Thank you kids <3
Saturday, March 7, 2015
Simplicity at its best.
It's been a while.
Life has been more hectic week after week. Just had possibly the worst week in my working life, but I have come to realize that when the worst happens, so does it get easier to identify the simple but best moments as well. I started the week off on a bad note because weekend marking was a rush and I was in a grumpy mood. All that was on my mind were deadlines, deadlines and more deadlines that I had to meet. No time, no time, no time, I thought to myself as I tried to envision how my week would turn out. Bad, horrible, terrible. When midweek came, I tried something new. I remember someone told me to look at things with positivity, not with negativity. So I tried to focus on the good things, even though I was tired and still grumpy.
Slowly I began to notice the small things.
My students whom I once labelled as 'troublesome' and 'difficult to handle' were manageable. They were the class that brought me much laughter even though I had so much on my mind. They surprised me by not only passing, but excelling in their tests as a class in general, and that was something I didn't expect. I promised a student a few weeks ago that if he scored an A1 (distinction), I would give him a hi five. And when I did, he couldn't stop smiling. That touched my heart so greatly, because while I initially chose to be bitter and focus on ambitious targets that I wanted for the class, what the kids wanted from me as a teacher was so simple, so innocent that it was easy for me to just brush it off and overlook. And when I saw how the students brightened up when I told them how proud I was of them, and I was happy that they did well, inside I felt quite ashamed. Is this what people mean when they say sometimes people are too caught up in the rat race that they block out all semblance of what's important? I promise myself, I will open my eyes more, look around more, observe more, and be appreciative towards the people I am trying to inspire, instead of the mountain piles of work in front of me. Thank you, dear students, for reminding me of what's important.
I have to say again, my colleagues are the nicest bunch of people I have ever met. So extremely thankful for my workplace environment, where everyone is helpful towards each other. I sense the care and concern, and even though I had to stay in school for close to a dozen hours almost everyday this week, these people made it bearable and kept me from going crazy and that is one of the few aspects I really appreciate about being at work.
Praying for a better, more eventful week ahead. It's finally Week 10 and i am glad. Time flies.
Life has been more hectic week after week. Just had possibly the worst week in my working life, but I have come to realize that when the worst happens, so does it get easier to identify the simple but best moments as well. I started the week off on a bad note because weekend marking was a rush and I was in a grumpy mood. All that was on my mind were deadlines, deadlines and more deadlines that I had to meet. No time, no time, no time, I thought to myself as I tried to envision how my week would turn out. Bad, horrible, terrible. When midweek came, I tried something new. I remember someone told me to look at things with positivity, not with negativity. So I tried to focus on the good things, even though I was tired and still grumpy.
Slowly I began to notice the small things.
My students whom I once labelled as 'troublesome' and 'difficult to handle' were manageable. They were the class that brought me much laughter even though I had so much on my mind. They surprised me by not only passing, but excelling in their tests as a class in general, and that was something I didn't expect. I promised a student a few weeks ago that if he scored an A1 (distinction), I would give him a hi five. And when I did, he couldn't stop smiling. That touched my heart so greatly, because while I initially chose to be bitter and focus on ambitious targets that I wanted for the class, what the kids wanted from me as a teacher was so simple, so innocent that it was easy for me to just brush it off and overlook. And when I saw how the students brightened up when I told them how proud I was of them, and I was happy that they did well, inside I felt quite ashamed. Is this what people mean when they say sometimes people are too caught up in the rat race that they block out all semblance of what's important? I promise myself, I will open my eyes more, look around more, observe more, and be appreciative towards the people I am trying to inspire, instead of the mountain piles of work in front of me. Thank you, dear students, for reminding me of what's important.
I have to say again, my colleagues are the nicest bunch of people I have ever met. So extremely thankful for my workplace environment, where everyone is helpful towards each other. I sense the care and concern, and even though I had to stay in school for close to a dozen hours almost everyday this week, these people made it bearable and kept me from going crazy and that is one of the few aspects I really appreciate about being at work.
Praying for a better, more eventful week ahead. It's finally Week 10 and i am glad. Time flies.
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Light of the world, Forever Reign
Tonight was well-spent catch up time with my Crusade DG. Haven't seen the girls in almost a year, time flies man. As I was early (for once), I decided to randomly window shop to while away time. As I walked into this particular shop, my phone suddenly blacked out and restarted itself, so I had to remove my earphones to reset my phone. As I did so, I heard the song that was playing in the shop, and I believe it was You speaking words of encouragement to me.
You are peace, You are peace
When my fear is crippling
You are truth, You are truth,
Even in my wandering
Oh I'm running to Your arms,
I'm running to Your arms
The riches of Your love,
Will always be enough.
You are here, You are here
In Your presence I'm made whole
You are God, You are God,
Of all else I'm letting go.
Thank You for reassurance time and again, Thank You for speaking into my heart. You are bigger than my troubles, and I will face my giants with You by my side.
You are peace, You are peace
When my fear is crippling
You are truth, You are truth,
Even in my wandering
Oh I'm running to Your arms,
I'm running to Your arms
The riches of Your love,
Will always be enough.
You are here, You are here
In Your presence I'm made whole
You are God, You are God,
Of all else I'm letting go.
Thank You for reassurance time and again, Thank You for speaking into my heart. You are bigger than my troubles, and I will face my giants with You by my side.
Friday, January 30, 2015
Good times bad times.
It's been a long time since I last summoned up enough energy to utilize this space.. but I want to write the following post so that I never forget the feeling that I'm feeling now. Honestly this week has been eventful.. from feeling at my lowest and horriblest to feeling fulfilled and content, everything came wrapped up like a package with a big bow for me.
Half of the week saw me shrouded in feelings of helplessness because things were just going further and further downhill at work. Disobedient kids, noisy kids, kids that gave up, and amongst this chaos, kids who were actually genuine and wanted so much to learn. Trying desperately to find that balance of teaching effectively and managing the more difficult classes proved to be a huge challenge and I failed not once, but twice. Trying to control the students and make them interested in what I had to deliver was far from successful and again and again I wanted to cry and just give everything up. I never, ever want to experience what I experienced again this week, but I know that such difficult situations will present itself once again to me. Still trying to help the various different personalities in any given class, but I am struggling more than I expected to. Is this good? Does this mean I'm being tested and forced to step out of my comfort zone? If so, then my prayers were answered and I am learning to be independent. But then again, the fear at the back of my mind resurfaces again, would I be able to achieve what I intended to, or would everything backfire on me and make me sink further underwater? I need more guidance, but right now I am unable to see it. Am praying, hoping for the best in the coming weeks, I really hope that I can overcome this.
As there were sucky periods of time where I really just wanted to pull all my hair out and wrap myself in a blanket and never come out, there were also gaps in between that made me take steps forward and face reality bravely. I am blessed so much, blessed with lovely colleagues who smile at me in the walkways, colleagues who offer their listening ears to me even though they have a mountain load of work to clear themselves, colleagues who specially saved food for me when I was out for competitions and hadn't eaten anything the whole day, all these small kind gestures make me really encouraged to press on and not be hindered by whatever. Makes me want to be a better person and try that little bit harder to be more like them. I am just starting out but these people are really an inspiration and motivation to me. I can't be more thankful, really.
Initially, I complained because I had to stay back and check on my form class after school as they were decorating their classroom and wanted some sort of guidance. Why couldn't I just go home and catch up on much-needed sleep? I intended to just go for an hour or so and then speed out of school as fast as I could, but in the end, I stayed three hours to talk to some of the kids. And I don't regret my decision at all. I watched them make beautiful pieces of art with just their hands and creative minds, I listened as they shared with me completely random things, even more stupidly random videos, and saw how happy they were when they interacted with one another. Made me feel like I was in secondary school all over again. Amidst all these, they shared some more serious things on their hearts with me, and I am glad that they trust me enough to have the courage to tell me all this.
"Ms Lee, now you're talking to us not as our teacher, but as our friend, okay?" And my heart swelled with warmth because these kids are so young yet they are so genuine with their words and thoughts. Sometimes, I need to stop being so caught up with all that is happening, take a step back and learn to think like these kids. They see the positive even when rubbish is thrown at them. And that is something that I admire. Thank you to my lovely class kids, I'm really starting to warm up to each and every one of you. My three hours couldn't have been more well-spent, and I just want to remember this Friday chillout session for as long as I can.
Thank You to God for holding my hand and standing by my side even when all I wanted to do was to pity myself and avoid this whole difficult situation. Now I see that it is not the way I should go, and I know You want me to face up to my fears and be brave in my actions. I will try my best, I will get out of this whirlwind, and when I am able to brush all these behind me, I will know that You are the one working a miracle in my life. I have doubted You countless times as a result of my own despair and I am sorry. I see that in even the most horrid situations, You still love me and You have provided a silver lining in every dark cloud that passes by. I cannot say how much I am grateful for that. I will be stronger, and this is not the end.
Counting my blessings, and trying hard.
Half of the week saw me shrouded in feelings of helplessness because things were just going further and further downhill at work. Disobedient kids, noisy kids, kids that gave up, and amongst this chaos, kids who were actually genuine and wanted so much to learn. Trying desperately to find that balance of teaching effectively and managing the more difficult classes proved to be a huge challenge and I failed not once, but twice. Trying to control the students and make them interested in what I had to deliver was far from successful and again and again I wanted to cry and just give everything up. I never, ever want to experience what I experienced again this week, but I know that such difficult situations will present itself once again to me. Still trying to help the various different personalities in any given class, but I am struggling more than I expected to. Is this good? Does this mean I'm being tested and forced to step out of my comfort zone? If so, then my prayers were answered and I am learning to be independent. But then again, the fear at the back of my mind resurfaces again, would I be able to achieve what I intended to, or would everything backfire on me and make me sink further underwater? I need more guidance, but right now I am unable to see it. Am praying, hoping for the best in the coming weeks, I really hope that I can overcome this.
As there were sucky periods of time where I really just wanted to pull all my hair out and wrap myself in a blanket and never come out, there were also gaps in between that made me take steps forward and face reality bravely. I am blessed so much, blessed with lovely colleagues who smile at me in the walkways, colleagues who offer their listening ears to me even though they have a mountain load of work to clear themselves, colleagues who specially saved food for me when I was out for competitions and hadn't eaten anything the whole day, all these small kind gestures make me really encouraged to press on and not be hindered by whatever. Makes me want to be a better person and try that little bit harder to be more like them. I am just starting out but these people are really an inspiration and motivation to me. I can't be more thankful, really.
Initially, I complained because I had to stay back and check on my form class after school as they were decorating their classroom and wanted some sort of guidance. Why couldn't I just go home and catch up on much-needed sleep? I intended to just go for an hour or so and then speed out of school as fast as I could, but in the end, I stayed three hours to talk to some of the kids. And I don't regret my decision at all. I watched them make beautiful pieces of art with just their hands and creative minds, I listened as they shared with me completely random things, even more stupidly random videos, and saw how happy they were when they interacted with one another. Made me feel like I was in secondary school all over again. Amidst all these, they shared some more serious things on their hearts with me, and I am glad that they trust me enough to have the courage to tell me all this.
"Ms Lee, now you're talking to us not as our teacher, but as our friend, okay?" And my heart swelled with warmth because these kids are so young yet they are so genuine with their words and thoughts. Sometimes, I need to stop being so caught up with all that is happening, take a step back and learn to think like these kids. They see the positive even when rubbish is thrown at them. And that is something that I admire. Thank you to my lovely class kids, I'm really starting to warm up to each and every one of you. My three hours couldn't have been more well-spent, and I just want to remember this Friday chillout session for as long as I can.
Thank You to God for holding my hand and standing by my side even when all I wanted to do was to pity myself and avoid this whole difficult situation. Now I see that it is not the way I should go, and I know You want me to face up to my fears and be brave in my actions. I will try my best, I will get out of this whirlwind, and when I am able to brush all these behind me, I will know that You are the one working a miracle in my life. I have doubted You countless times as a result of my own despair and I am sorry. I see that in even the most horrid situations, You still love me and You have provided a silver lining in every dark cloud that passes by. I cannot say how much I am grateful for that. I will be stronger, and this is not the end.
Counting my blessings, and trying hard.
Thursday, December 25, 2014
The most wonderful time of the year
Another year has almost come to an end, and 2015 is fast approaching. Every year seems to be passing faster than the next, and this acceleration of time sometimes scares me. As the year comes to an end, I've been doing much reflections on my part. I cannot find a word to describe 2014 simply, because I think that too many overwhelming incidents have occurred within the time span of a year. However, for the good and the (seemingly) bad, I thank God for seeing me through yet another year, and letting me get to know more and more individuals who I have come to treasure and be appreciative of.
For the times which I thought were difficult and horrible, I look back now and I see how these situations have actually been better than I thought that they would be. I hated the thought of graduating a year earlier than my friends, and I prayed desperately for a miracle, for my CAP to change so that I could just linger one more year in NUS. I even mentioned that I was willing to do anything just to not graduate at this time of my life. If only I could have seen how silly I was at that moment. Yea I graduated unwillingly, but the next half a year turned out to be more enriching than I could ever imagine. I was blessed with a workplace and colleagues who are so eager, nice and spontaneous, somewhere that I have learnt abundantly even though I've only been there a short 3 months plus. I've had so much more time to myself to do the things I love, and even ample time to just catch up on the rest that I didn't have much of a chance to in the past 3 years. The most important thing that I see clearly now would be that if I had advanced to Year 4 miraculously, I know I would have taken it for granted and tried to pull through with my own strength, and probably not be able to handle the workload and get discouraged for no reason. Slowly I came to understand God's plan amidst all the uncertainty, that my place was to be somewhere else. And as I accepted this fact, the road ahead seemed clearer and clearer. Even though there were times I relapsed (haha) and fell into the cycle of 'what ifs' and 'if onlys', I was always brought back to the path I was supposed to be on and given assurance repeatedly. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so stubborn to only see things through my own eyes, and this would be something I wanna work harder on in the new year, even though I don't make and stick to resolutions..
I'm thankful that even though I have graduated, friends from school still keep in contact, and I think that these communications really steered me on and encouraged me. For those who have made the effort, I am so appreciative. For the new friends that God has placed into my life, I'm so happy and I will work harder at maintaining the friendships that I have been blessed with. When I was so pessimistic before, I am learning to look at things through a larger lens scope and try to be more optimistic whatever the situation may be.
I love Christmas and that was the original point of this post, which I have digressed far from. I love the festivity, the lights in town and on random streets, and the holiday mood that seems to be present wherever I go. Everyone suddenly seems a lot nicer, more generous and just happier. I love receiving Christmas cards and my mother thought I was crazy smiling while reading the cards I got in the mail, but I didn't care haha. But more than receiving things, seeing people receive things and be happy gets me feeling happy too! I think that's what the spirit of Christmas is about, the willingness to give just like Christ has been generous to us. And beyond the presents and gift giving and feasting, I'm sure when God looks at His people enjoying the company of each other and spreading the spirit of love, He is overly joyful too. I am rambling and probably should end this post soon, but I really wish Christmas would never end, no one would need to go back to the hectic bustling working life and just take as much time as they want to express their love and gratitude for the people around me. But then again, who says the Christmas spirit can only exist during Christmas right? Haha.
Even as Christmas draws to a close, I hope everyone will still be happy. New Year is coming too, and thats another event to look forward to! I'm really excited and I really love the end year celebrations. Hehe. Wishing everyone peace and joy and much laughter in all that you do and wherever you go, I'll consolidate my thoughts and write a proper comprehensive reflection post at the end of the year probably.
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY! FELIZ NAVIDAD!! HOHOHO :D :D :D
For the times which I thought were difficult and horrible, I look back now and I see how these situations have actually been better than I thought that they would be. I hated the thought of graduating a year earlier than my friends, and I prayed desperately for a miracle, for my CAP to change so that I could just linger one more year in NUS. I even mentioned that I was willing to do anything just to not graduate at this time of my life. If only I could have seen how silly I was at that moment. Yea I graduated unwillingly, but the next half a year turned out to be more enriching than I could ever imagine. I was blessed with a workplace and colleagues who are so eager, nice and spontaneous, somewhere that I have learnt abundantly even though I've only been there a short 3 months plus. I've had so much more time to myself to do the things I love, and even ample time to just catch up on the rest that I didn't have much of a chance to in the past 3 years. The most important thing that I see clearly now would be that if I had advanced to Year 4 miraculously, I know I would have taken it for granted and tried to pull through with my own strength, and probably not be able to handle the workload and get discouraged for no reason. Slowly I came to understand God's plan amidst all the uncertainty, that my place was to be somewhere else. And as I accepted this fact, the road ahead seemed clearer and clearer. Even though there were times I relapsed (haha) and fell into the cycle of 'what ifs' and 'if onlys', I was always brought back to the path I was supposed to be on and given assurance repeatedly. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so stubborn to only see things through my own eyes, and this would be something I wanna work harder on in the new year, even though I don't make and stick to resolutions..
I'm thankful that even though I have graduated, friends from school still keep in contact, and I think that these communications really steered me on and encouraged me. For those who have made the effort, I am so appreciative. For the new friends that God has placed into my life, I'm so happy and I will work harder at maintaining the friendships that I have been blessed with. When I was so pessimistic before, I am learning to look at things through a larger lens scope and try to be more optimistic whatever the situation may be.
I love Christmas and that was the original point of this post, which I have digressed far from. I love the festivity, the lights in town and on random streets, and the holiday mood that seems to be present wherever I go. Everyone suddenly seems a lot nicer, more generous and just happier. I love receiving Christmas cards and my mother thought I was crazy smiling while reading the cards I got in the mail, but I didn't care haha. But more than receiving things, seeing people receive things and be happy gets me feeling happy too! I think that's what the spirit of Christmas is about, the willingness to give just like Christ has been generous to us. And beyond the presents and gift giving and feasting, I'm sure when God looks at His people enjoying the company of each other and spreading the spirit of love, He is overly joyful too. I am rambling and probably should end this post soon, but I really wish Christmas would never end, no one would need to go back to the hectic bustling working life and just take as much time as they want to express their love and gratitude for the people around me. But then again, who says the Christmas spirit can only exist during Christmas right? Haha.
Even as Christmas draws to a close, I hope everyone will still be happy. New Year is coming too, and thats another event to look forward to! I'm really excited and I really love the end year celebrations. Hehe. Wishing everyone peace and joy and much laughter in all that you do and wherever you go, I'll consolidate my thoughts and write a proper comprehensive reflection post at the end of the year probably.
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY! FELIZ NAVIDAD!! HOHOHO :D :D :D
Tuesday, December 23, 2014
DK
Sometimes it seems bleak
Sometimes things don't seem to go smoothly
Sometimes I want to drop everything and give up
But its exactly in these times I know You will intervene.
I need all the courage and willpower I can get to continue on being here but I know my strength is not enough. Relying on You and praying for a breakthrough and I know things will eventually add up and things will be rectified to what they were before. Over the past few days I have been reminded of Your great love and grace for all of us and it is by these reminders that I am once again in awe. You are faithful and You love me and that is all that I need to keep me going. The festive season has always been my favourite time of the year and I am really glad that I started looking forward to Christmas on the right footing. Thank You for making me see and believe in Your wondrous works once again.
Thanks to all those who walked by my side, those who took time out to share their testimonies of faith with me, and for reminding me time and again that we serve an all powerful Father.
Things can only get better because You are in control. Holding these promises close to my heart.
Sometimes things don't seem to go smoothly
Sometimes I want to drop everything and give up
But its exactly in these times I know You will intervene.
I need all the courage and willpower I can get to continue on being here but I know my strength is not enough. Relying on You and praying for a breakthrough and I know things will eventually add up and things will be rectified to what they were before. Over the past few days I have been reminded of Your great love and grace for all of us and it is by these reminders that I am once again in awe. You are faithful and You love me and that is all that I need to keep me going. The festive season has always been my favourite time of the year and I am really glad that I started looking forward to Christmas on the right footing. Thank You for making me see and believe in Your wondrous works once again.
Thanks to all those who walked by my side, those who took time out to share their testimonies of faith with me, and for reminding me time and again that we serve an all powerful Father.
Things can only get better because You are in control. Holding these promises close to my heart.
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