Thursday, May 19, 2011

Change


‘Change is the only constant’. We always hear people say this, but... Really?
I was reading through my old blogs, what attracted and amazed me most were all my password protected posts on Wordpress. I see the me a few years ago. And I look at myself now. Circumstances have changed, people have changed, I have changed. For the better or for worse I don’t really know, maybe it’s a mix of both.

Then again, how can someone/something stay constant all their life? Even water moves doesn’t it? In the form of ripples caused when there are disturbances. There’s been many disturbances in my life, some good some bad. And right where I stand now, I don’t like all this. I’m teaching my primary school kid about adaptations now, but ironically, can humans truly adapt at all? Or do we just push the bad experiences and memories aside, force ourselves to continue with life? Because that’s how it seems for me.

Almost every night the past haunts me. Like a broken record, I’ve said one too many a time. And there’s no way to stop the mental images and that’s what scares me the most. That I have changed, but the past has stayed the same. And will always stay the same. Something to keep you from moving on completely. I spend too much time wanting the past back, trying to find a rewind button to relieve all those feelings again. Then I realise everything’s changed.

Change is the only constant, not so true at all eh.

May 19th, 2011.